My mother is bugging me that I have not updated in a while, so here I go, trying to give it a try.
The problem is that I always surround myself with people who can write better than I can. I like to think that I am a rockstar writer, but I really know better. I am average at best. I have attempted to write several books. That is laughable at best, seeing as how I am a mediocre writer, I can’t spell to save my life and my story is fairly mediocre.
But then I think about the writing “training” I obtained while growing up. And while I am not perfect, it did teach me more than I will ever know. Mrs. Garcia, Mr. Tomlin, Mrs. Comer and my mother taught me how to write a proper paper, how to write a letter, how to write both professionally and creatively. You see when I was in high school I thought I was a fabulous writer, mostly because (once again) I surrounded myself with fabulous writers. I believe Mrs. Comer gave me my first “C” on a paper and it just about sent me over the edge. I was not used to that. I scheduled a conference with her to discuss the paper and she didn’t budge. She told me it was truly “C” quality work. Which was true, I hadn’t given it my all. It changed the way I wrote and approached writing. I never was as good as those around me, but I know that because of the tons of edited papers that each of the previous mentioned people gave to me, for all the red ink that has bleed over all over my work I became better. And because my mentors where so tough on me it made me become better. It made me try harder. It made me re-read my work, looking for mistakes (except spleeing (leaving, cuz, well- let’s be real it is truth)) and really giving it my all.
I am certainly not good now, but I am thankful that I can push publish and not be embarrassed about what I have written. Well, at least after I run it through spell check.
Showing posts with label remembering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label remembering. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 01, 2011
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Reflections
It has been several months since I have even had a simple moment to sit down and reflect on what the last year has looked like. But know, I find myself in that position. Sitting back and reflecting. Something that I think we should all do, especially when we change our lives in such a drastic way and several months have passed- you should sit back and think about if the choice you made was a good one, was one that you are proud of, is it making your life better or worse.
One year ago (almost exactly) I was hired to teach high school. This was a goal I had been working towards for longer than even I will admit. But I finally had accomplished it. And I was thrilled and terrified. I had never done anything like this before. And it was a drastic change. I had changed from a hotel manager to a cube dweller, and while that change was a lot bigger than I thought at the time, I knew this change was big and that things were going to be hard, but good.
And they were. Hard, so incredibly hard. Harder than any job I have ever had. But good. Better than anything that has happened in the recent years.
The last nine months have been so incredible that I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. Those first few days were terrifying, but I think the kids are so wrapped up in themselves that they don’t even realize you are as nervous as they are. And I was. Terrified. I wanted to do my very best but I was nervous. I also left my previous job with a sour taste in my mouth for “upper management” and was nervous that they wouldn’t like me anymore than those “in charge” had at the previous place.
But I started and poured my heart and soul into the job. So much in fact that my son asked me to go back to the other job because when I left the office at 5pm, I was gone, but this teacher thing followed me around everywhere. Always writing a lesson plan or thinking about a lesson or worrying about papers to grade. And if that was all done, then… I worried about those stinking kids like they were my own. But, his tune has changed, as I learned how to better use my time and now when I am home, I am almost always not working on school stuff- that he can see. Plus, with summer within sight, he is pleased as punch that we will be home together to play and act silly all summer long.
With only a little bit of school stuff left to do. Only I will do most of that while he is away of asleep.
So the last year has been amazing. I only had 9 seniors this semester, but a few of them were extra special. One who is too cool for school. Who painted a beautiful mural on my wall which I will cry over not being able to take with me when we get our new school. She wouldn’t even look at me at graduation, but I know she was happy to see me there acting like a silly, crazy person who had shown up to see them graduate. I saw that twinkle in her eye as she walked passed me. The second was that kid who took my class, a freshman level course, as a senior. He just had to have a place to park himself every other day for an hour and a half. He was a good boy, who always did his work, even the stuff he thought was ridiculous. He carried that flour baby around and he sewed several pillows, and I think he might have learned a little something in the process. These two kiddos will help me remember my first year teaching. Along with a dozen or so others crazy under classmen. Like the mechanical baby girl, who talked incessantly about those silly mechanical babies until she had to carry around a flour baby for a week. Haven’t heard a peep about them since. Or the student athlete who always did her work BEFORE she was going to be out for athletics. And managed to get a 98 in my class. And the poor little boy who transferred schools at the semester and gave me the first and last teacher gift I have ever received. The teacher mug with candy. This boy was special to me, because after the first day of school if I had never seen him again, it would have been too soon. But we muddled through and when he left he had been clean and sober for 4 weeks and was proud to tell me about it. And I was proud of him for it.
So over all the last year has been a whirl wind of time. I don’t even remember feeling down in the trenches, but I know I was there. I know there was a time when I felt overwhelmed and under qualified and lost for what to do and say. But know I know better than I did before and I will know even better this time next year. I can’t believe how far I have come. I can’t believe how excited I am to go back next year and start all over with those silly little freshman. And some other classes that will have more upper classmen in them. This has been the best career change I have ever made. And I think I am only as good as I am because I come from a line of educators and because of the life I have lived up to this point. If I hadn’t worked all the crazy jobs I had in the past, then I wouldn’t be half as prepared as I am for this now.
I love it. I love hearing “SUMPTER!” in the hallways, from several students. I love the nothing drawings that students have made for me. I love the exhaustion that I feel most days. I love that there are students who love me and students who hate me. I love that I am making a difference in the lives of some of these knuckleheads. They have left their mark on me, I just hope that I have left a mark on them.
One year ago (almost exactly) I was hired to teach high school. This was a goal I had been working towards for longer than even I will admit. But I finally had accomplished it. And I was thrilled and terrified. I had never done anything like this before. And it was a drastic change. I had changed from a hotel manager to a cube dweller, and while that change was a lot bigger than I thought at the time, I knew this change was big and that things were going to be hard, but good.
And they were. Hard, so incredibly hard. Harder than any job I have ever had. But good. Better than anything that has happened in the recent years.
The last nine months have been so incredible that I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. Those first few days were terrifying, but I think the kids are so wrapped up in themselves that they don’t even realize you are as nervous as they are. And I was. Terrified. I wanted to do my very best but I was nervous. I also left my previous job with a sour taste in my mouth for “upper management” and was nervous that they wouldn’t like me anymore than those “in charge” had at the previous place.
But I started and poured my heart and soul into the job. So much in fact that my son asked me to go back to the other job because when I left the office at 5pm, I was gone, but this teacher thing followed me around everywhere. Always writing a lesson plan or thinking about a lesson or worrying about papers to grade. And if that was all done, then… I worried about those stinking kids like they were my own. But, his tune has changed, as I learned how to better use my time and now when I am home, I am almost always not working on school stuff- that he can see. Plus, with summer within sight, he is pleased as punch that we will be home together to play and act silly all summer long.
With only a little bit of school stuff left to do. Only I will do most of that while he is away of asleep.
So the last year has been amazing. I only had 9 seniors this semester, but a few of them were extra special. One who is too cool for school. Who painted a beautiful mural on my wall which I will cry over not being able to take with me when we get our new school. She wouldn’t even look at me at graduation, but I know she was happy to see me there acting like a silly, crazy person who had shown up to see them graduate. I saw that twinkle in her eye as she walked passed me. The second was that kid who took my class, a freshman level course, as a senior. He just had to have a place to park himself every other day for an hour and a half. He was a good boy, who always did his work, even the stuff he thought was ridiculous. He carried that flour baby around and he sewed several pillows, and I think he might have learned a little something in the process. These two kiddos will help me remember my first year teaching. Along with a dozen or so others crazy under classmen. Like the mechanical baby girl, who talked incessantly about those silly mechanical babies until she had to carry around a flour baby for a week. Haven’t heard a peep about them since. Or the student athlete who always did her work BEFORE she was going to be out for athletics. And managed to get a 98 in my class. And the poor little boy who transferred schools at the semester and gave me the first and last teacher gift I have ever received. The teacher mug with candy. This boy was special to me, because after the first day of school if I had never seen him again, it would have been too soon. But we muddled through and when he left he had been clean and sober for 4 weeks and was proud to tell me about it. And I was proud of him for it.
So over all the last year has been a whirl wind of time. I don’t even remember feeling down in the trenches, but I know I was there. I know there was a time when I felt overwhelmed and under qualified and lost for what to do and say. But know I know better than I did before and I will know even better this time next year. I can’t believe how far I have come. I can’t believe how excited I am to go back next year and start all over with those silly little freshman. And some other classes that will have more upper classmen in them. This has been the best career change I have ever made. And I think I am only as good as I am because I come from a line of educators and because of the life I have lived up to this point. If I hadn’t worked all the crazy jobs I had in the past, then I wouldn’t be half as prepared as I am for this now.
I love it. I love hearing “SUMPTER!” in the hallways, from several students. I love the nothing drawings that students have made for me. I love the exhaustion that I feel most days. I love that there are students who love me and students who hate me. I love that I am making a difference in the lives of some of these knuckleheads. They have left their mark on me, I just hope that I have left a mark on them.
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
Happy Birthday little one
Today, my baby girl is 10. Take a moment and let that sink in. She is 10. (Insert HUGE sigh from me.)
It seems that just yesterday we were bringing her home from the hospital when I was just 20 years old. I know I just gave my age away, but, seriously people, we have bigger fish to fry.
In these last 10 years I have watched my child go from an extremely strong willed child. So much so that I had to hold her down some nights to get her to go to sleep. She was a fierce child.
She turned into an even stronger willed child, who has already been picked up from the police station. She sure gave her father and I a run for our money. Never a dull moment with my little one.
She developed a speech “thing” that even the diagnostician had never heard of before. She began going to school 2 years earlier than she should have. She worked her way out of that speech thing, but began to struggle with reading. What a long year 2nd and 3rd grade were.
Then, it was as if a switch went off and she got it. She became my little academic. She is excelling in all of her subjects. She is reading so much that we can’t keep books in the house for her. She is currently reading Marley and Me, and eating it up. And that is not exactly at a 4th grade reading level. I am SO super proud if her.
She has also developed her first real crush. She told me about it just last night. I was so happy and sad at the same time. I was so sad because she is becoming a young lady, but so happy that she felt comfortable enough to tell me about it.
Here she is just last weekend. Beautiful as ever.
I love you Emily, Happy 10th. I hope it is everything that you want it to be.
It seems that just yesterday we were bringing her home from the hospital when I was just 20 years old. I know I just gave my age away, but, seriously people, we have bigger fish to fry.
In these last 10 years I have watched my child go from an extremely strong willed child. So much so that I had to hold her down some nights to get her to go to sleep. She was a fierce child.
She turned into an even stronger willed child, who has already been picked up from the police station. She sure gave her father and I a run for our money. Never a dull moment with my little one.
She developed a speech “thing” that even the diagnostician had never heard of before. She began going to school 2 years earlier than she should have. She worked her way out of that speech thing, but began to struggle with reading. What a long year 2nd and 3rd grade were.
Then, it was as if a switch went off and she got it. She became my little academic. She is excelling in all of her subjects. She is reading so much that we can’t keep books in the house for her. She is currently reading Marley and Me, and eating it up. And that is not exactly at a 4th grade reading level. I am SO super proud if her.
She has also developed her first real crush. She told me about it just last night. I was so happy and sad at the same time. I was so sad because she is becoming a young lady, but so happy that she felt comfortable enough to tell me about it.
Here she is just last weekend. Beautiful as ever.
I love you Emily, Happy 10th. I hope it is everything that you want it to be.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
A change
My mother, who has been a teacher for a “few” years decided to send me a “back to school” box. I received it in the mail this afternoon and opened with the excitement of a young child. You see, my parents oftentimes send my children boxes filled with prizes and fun toys. Only this time, it was all for me.
I slowly opened the box and found this:
It was almost as good as it gets for me. I love school supplies. They bring me happiness that is really quite unnatural. The post-its and highlighters. They bring me joy that many people do not understand.
When I left a job about 4 years ago, because I was being promoted, my boss had left for the afternnon in order to go to Sam’s Club. He returned later that evening to the office with his hands full of stuff. In one hand was a beautiful framed print, in the other was a box with a 2 pound bag of m & m’s and a stack of yellow post-it’s. I asked him what he had been up to and he told me he had been out to purchase my going away present. I immediately was giddy with the prospect of my going away present being the box with the m & m’s and post-it’s. It wasn’t, and I left that place with a beautiful framed picture which I have kept at my desk for the last four years and it has reminded me daily of my time at that hotel. It will make it’s way into my classroom as well. And now, I have these wonderful office supplies, which will carry me through my teaching career.
I can’t wait.
I slowly opened the box and found this:
It was almost as good as it gets for me. I love school supplies. They bring me happiness that is really quite unnatural. The post-its and highlighters. They bring me joy that many people do not understand.
When I left a job about 4 years ago, because I was being promoted, my boss had left for the afternnon in order to go to Sam’s Club. He returned later that evening to the office with his hands full of stuff. In one hand was a beautiful framed print, in the other was a box with a 2 pound bag of m & m’s and a stack of yellow post-it’s. I asked him what he had been up to and he told me he had been out to purchase my going away present. I immediately was giddy with the prospect of my going away present being the box with the m & m’s and post-it’s. It wasn’t, and I left that place with a beautiful framed picture which I have kept at my desk for the last four years and it has reminded me daily of my time at that hotel. It will make it’s way into my classroom as well. And now, I have these wonderful office supplies, which will carry me through my teaching career.
I can’t wait.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Old Bessie
Well, it appears that “Old Bessie” may be down for good.
On Sunday, as I was driving to drop Emily off at camp, Josh was driving to work. Only he didn’t make it. About halfway the car started over heating and he had just enough time to get her off the highway before she just plain stopped. After towing her back into town, and getting an estimate for a new engine ($4000!) we have decided it is time to let her go. But she has been good to us, for 7 long years. We bought her right after Jacob was born, because we thought we needed a bigger car.
I thought I would show her off in the best way that I can.
Hanging out in the car wash.
Running to the car with our friends.
Reading the Bible in the car.
Just being silly.
Sleeping.
Riding our big boy bike next to her.
Wearing ridiculous hats while driving her.
Carwash again. See, we took car of her.
Working on her.
Taking the dogs for a ride in her.
Going to Six Flags in her.
She even went to Kentucky!
Being dramatic while riding in her.
Celebrating the holidays with her.
Just being Jacob while in her.
Sleeping after seeing the Cheetah Girls.
Lounging in her.
She even made it through the huge ice storm 18 months ago.
What is really odd about the whole situation is- it is really like almost loosing a family member. We have owned her for so long and she has been with us through think and thin.
I am sad to see her go, and even sadder to think about what we are going to do about it.
Goodbye Old Bessie, its been fun.
On Sunday, as I was driving to drop Emily off at camp, Josh was driving to work. Only he didn’t make it. About halfway the car started over heating and he had just enough time to get her off the highway before she just plain stopped. After towing her back into town, and getting an estimate for a new engine ($4000!) we have decided it is time to let her go. But she has been good to us, for 7 long years. We bought her right after Jacob was born, because we thought we needed a bigger car.
I thought I would show her off in the best way that I can.
Hanging out in the car wash.
Running to the car with our friends.
Reading the Bible in the car.
Just being silly.
Sleeping.
Riding our big boy bike next to her.
Wearing ridiculous hats while driving her.
Carwash again. See, we took car of her.
Working on her.
Taking the dogs for a ride in her.
Going to Six Flags in her.
She even went to Kentucky!
Being dramatic while riding in her.
Celebrating the holidays with her.
Just being Jacob while in her.
Sleeping after seeing the Cheetah Girls.
Lounging in her.
She even made it through the huge ice storm 18 months ago.
What is really odd about the whole situation is- it is really like almost loosing a family member. We have owned her for so long and she has been with us through think and thin.
I am sad to see her go, and even sadder to think about what we are going to do about it.
Goodbye Old Bessie, its been fun.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Happy 10 years!
It was 10 years ago today that I woke up a little nervous and excited. I had several of my best girl friends that were to be my bridesmaids staying with me at my parent’s house. Girl friends who I am STILL in contact with today. Granted some more than others, but I am still in contact with them! They are some of the greatest friends I have ever had.
We hung out in the nursery at church, our dressing room of sorts, ate Burger Time rolled tacos for lunch and made floral head wreaths for my Maid Of Honor and the flower girls who all had hair too short for the gently placed flowers like the other girls.
Amy helped me into my dress and did my make-up. And attempted to keep my nerves down.
We headed into the auditorium for a few pictures prior to the ceremony. But once people began arriving I was quickly whisked away to be hidden from anybody’s eyes prior to my entrance.
I was taken into the cry room at my childhood church and left alone. I watched through those windows as friends and family members began finding their seats. As the music began, both sets of grandparents made their way into the auditorium and found their seats near the front of the room and then the groomsmen filed in, with Josh as their leader.
I watched as the music changed and my four bridesmaids began their walk towards the front of the auditorium at which point I felt my father tap me on my shoulder and tell me it was time.
I walked down the hallway of my childhood church and waited as the flower girls were sent down the aisle before me. As the music swelled, I made my entrance with my dad by my side. In the pictures, I look terrified. But I think I was more nervous than anything else.
I was lead down the aisle by my dad and given away. My “uncle” Dean began the ceremony which had horribly embarrassing stories sprinkled throughout that only those who have known and loved you for nearly your entire life can retell at your wedding without the bride loosing her cool. As horrified as I was, I was grateful to have people surrounding me who knew me and my history.
I really don’t remember much of that day, but I doubt many brides do.
So honey, here’s to the last ten years and I can’t wait for the next 10!
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